s u r v i v e d

And thank you for being so supportive thorough these tough weeks, I'm so glad I have you.

ALL TIME (b)LOW

Been listening to All Time Low's latest album all the time. Jack Barakat and friends captured my attention, AS ALWAAAAYS! HA! I give 8 out of 10 for I Feel Like Dancing, Time Bomb, and Just the Way I'm not. Hustlers, are you ready for their upcoming concert in Jakarta, 6th Oct? Go follow @JAVAmusikindo for more info.

Anw, how's life buddies? Mine? Good, pretty good. Haven't wrote anything here like.. for ages. Too much things happened but too bad i didn't put it here. College is still cruel, final exams will start on this 26th and I'm not sure about the preparation. I'm hoping that I'll do well on my exams. Organization? Truth to be told, I'm getting bored, seriously. Half year to go but... Ah. Tones of work to be completed, revision to be done, LPJ to be collected lalala. People, I still remember your promise to help each other (included ME), so can you keep your promise and make it true? Hello? Blah. I'm tired. Trough it all, got tons supports from the all time pom-pom brighten my days. It's not stomachache, it's butterflies... still :)

one zero zero one one one

the 365th day, the 12th month, the first year. oh wait, i should put 'it supposed to be' in the beginning of this post, shouldn't i? looked back at the good old times, those memories popping around my mind. this time, i do really know what's my blog's title actually means - Memories never come back, it's out of sight but not out of mind. call me bad on forgetting, call me bad on letting go, call me bad on moving on, call me weak, it's all up to you. if those are subjects, i bet my score would be E.

dear Allah,

You work in mysterious ways. the most hurting pain, uncountable tears, long-lasting sadness brought me to be stronger. Thank You for always being there for me, listen to every single of my prays, my sighs. You are the place where i find nobody to talk to. Gusti Allah mboten sare, these words belong to You, really :) also thanks for giving me so-called soul sisters :) thanks and thanks and thanks! zillions of thanks wouldn't enough, Allah :)

dear soul-sisters,

let me say thank you so muchies for lend me shoulders to cry on, for gave me loads of advices, also for the warmest hugs. i remembered how care you all to me when i'm in the lowest point of life, until now. you know me so well, you really do. you really know what i feel, although i haven't told anything. you are mood boosters, smile makers, pain healers, you are better than the best. having you around me is one of the best thing in my life. i know you don't need your names here to know how much i love you all, right? xxxooo

dear you,

haha dunno what to say, too much to say actually :P let's waving hands to binary rules and say "see you 90 years later" . never imagine before how things could change just like now. although we a'int meant to be and the word 'forever' is over, but these butterflies are still here. they haven't gone yet. i've told them to go away, but they won't. they thought that here is their place. sorry for keeping these butterflies :( always put you on my prayer list, wishing you all of the best since i know i.. might.. be.. not.. your.. best :)

so this is my first post after inactive period, and this post is requested by you. ehh err stop stop.. i'm running out of words ha-ha!

ps :

this post is supposed to be posted 12 days ago.

Status History

HELLO!

barusan jalan-jalan ke blognya dek menur dan nemu link http://apps.facebook.com/mystatuses/ buat ngecek satus-status fb kita dari jaman baheula sampe yang paling anyar. iseng-iseng aja nyobain dan bener, semua status yang pernah saya posting dari masih baru-barunya facebookan sampe status yang beberapa jam lalu saya posting ada semua. ini beberapa status yang story-behind-it nya masih keinget sampe sekarang..

Iffa 2 more chapters included loads of kotoba & patterns of sentence! geez, feelin like this brain was burnt :| (Wed, 06 May 2009 14:23:08 GMT)

lagi dipusingkan dengan ujian jepang keesokan harinya, ngafalin bejibun kosakata & pola kalimat. but i love learning japanese anw, dan alhamdulillah selama di SMA ga pernah remidi ujian jepang hihi :p

Iffa finally, after 6 hours sitting in front of my lappy, workin wif html codes, i've been updated my first-html- blogskin successfully! *widee smile* (Thu, 07 May 2009 15:40:55 GMT)

ini pertama kalinya saya utak-atik template blog, pertama kalinya main html. pokoknya waktu itu bener-bener buta html. ngutak-atiknya jg cm bermodal googling & modal sok tau, jadi ga heran kalo sampe 6 jam heheh untung nebeng speedynya tante :p

Iffa terimakasih saya ucapkan kepada teman2 sekalian yg telah mempercayakan peran POCONGAN kepada saya untuk drama b.Jawa. sungguh suatu kehormatan bg saya. saya cinta kalian! (Sat, 09 May 2009 06:21:05 GMT)

ungkapan kekesalan yang sekesal-kesalnya gara-gara saya ditunjuk memerankan pocongan buat drama ujian praktek bahasa jawa. sempet pake acara ngambek segala loh saya hahaha tp akhirnya saya berhasil memerankan peran tersebut dengan penuh penjiwaan. pokoknya ini drama paling kocak yg pernah sy mainkan! *bbeeuh belaga pemain drama aje :p

Iffa kemaren terkapar di rumah sakit, malem ini ngemol sama mumeh haha! (Sun, 14 Jun 2009 13:45:57 GMT)

baru sehari pulang dr rumah sakit gara-gara kena hepatitis, e malah jeng-jeng sama emak nyari dress buat prom. luka bekas infus belom ilang, badan masih lemes tapi semangat shopping ga boleh kendor hehe

Iffa dingin2 gini bakar jagung + barbeque + api unggunan di halaman villa sambil liat bintang bareng temen sekelas :) (Sat, 11 Jul 2009 12:44:12 GMT)

padepokan's farewell 1st session :) best night ewveeer!

Iffa our 2nd trip to jepara on wednesday wouldnt be the end we do everything together! (Mon, 27 Jul 2009 12:39:18 GMT)

padepokan's farewell 2nd session :) get wet on beach :)

Iffa quote for today: sudah malam apa sudah tau? (Thu, 17 Sep 2009 15:27:29 GMT)

ini waktu habis buber padepokan ramadhan taun lalu. selese makan kita rame-rame curhat-curhatan, cekakak-cekikik di halaman rumahnya sasri. sudah malam apa sudah tau itu tentang cerita horor di salah satu institut terkenal di bandung :p

Iffa lagi ngerjain tugas PW di WP duduk ndelosor nggak pewe sambil dengerin pee wee gaskins. (Tue, 13 Oct 2009 08:26:28 GMT)

yang ini lagi ngelembur bikin tugas kuliah rame-rame :D

Iffa hey you silly! :) (Sat, 26 Dec 2009 03:56:23 GMT)

yes, you! i talked to you, mdbstr.

Iffa ngerasa udah lari jauh bgt, capek, keringetan, kehausan tp gak tau tujuannya kemana ;( (Thu, 07 Jan 2010 05:45:09 GMT)

then you asked, "maksud statusmu ini apa?" ...

Iffa this butterflies keep rolling on my stomach. lol (Sun, 10 Jan 2010 10:44:26 GMT)

100110 :(

Iffa ikalong, ikal si tukang ngalong ;) (Thu, 21 Jan 2010 00:16:37 GMT)

kombinasi antara ikal, tokoh di Sang Pemimpi yang punya mimpi ke paris dan kalong, sejenis hewan malam.

Iffa be better, closer, longer, longer & longer aaaamin =) (Sun, 31 Jan 2010 03:38:09 GMT)

and now it's ended :(

Iffa chitato sisa masih awet dan ga mlempem :) (Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:16:44 GMT)

chitato sisa yg saya bawa ke cilacap. hampir aja diminta puput tp ga saya bolehin, karena.... hmm

Iffa jimbron dan si empunyanya, duo konyol yg penuh kejutan :) (Thu, 25 Feb 2010 13:05:01 GMT)

tentang.. sebuah vespa bernama jimbron dan pemiliknya..

Iffa got a special thing from someone special :) (Thu, 11 Mar 2010 02:55:02 GMT)

kejutan holga.

Iffa if i could press the undo button, back to that day then capture all moments, once again =,= (Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:30:10 GMT)

kecewa luar biasa gara-gara tragedi rol pertama yang gagal dicetak gara-gara salah obat waktu proses pencucian. kalo bukan rol pertama mungkin ga bakal se-kecewa ini.

Iffa 5 mins for 5 days =.= (Thu, 15 Apr 2010 23:54:11 GMT)

got 5 mins midnight call from you, after 5 days without any communication.

Iffa membengkak, menyipit, mengantung (Thu, 29 Apr 2010 13:02:29 GMT)

heartbreak is a serious mental disorder

Iffa one day bed rest after one day trip. (Sun, 04 Apr 2010 03:34:21 GMT)

kickfest, halte keren, soto porsi besar :(

Iffa the silence isn't so bad till i look my hand and feel sad, cause the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly x( (Sun, 06 Jun 2010 14:33:20 GMT)

lirik Vanilla Twilight nya Owl City. benar-benar menohok.

Iffa 'ten' to 'five' (Wed, 09 Jun 2010 22:15:06 GMT)

it's supposed to be the 5th on july 10th :(

Iffa rajin mengompres supaya kempes. (Fri, 18 Jun 2010 15:16:49 GMT)

jatoh dari motor yang mengakibatkan bibir saya lebih seksi dr angelina jolie.

:(

aaah jadi keinget lagi :(

If I Could

the reds have nowhere to go. surrounded by the blues, here there and everywhere. watch out, think twice or more. another wrong step would be the worst mistake. the better way is by ending the game and starting the new one. case closed. game over. this is what move-on means.

Manage Me, I'm a Mess

i don't know.
either unable, or not.
sit at a table, facing each other.
do not talk to each other, no regard each other.

others may be aware there is a strange,
but maybe not.
and i will try as if nothing ever happened,
you would too, I'm sure.
die-off of not having direct contact.

secretly wished you would not have come.
for our own good,
or for the sake of kindness to be exact.
don't need to see you look like a far from pleasant but i missed every day.
don't need to hear you laughing, talking.
i was secretly hoping you will not be present later.
so i do not need to act right.
because i know you know i'm not okay.
and will not fine to see you sitting across the table,
laugh, and think that i'm just one of your old friend.

like we used to

does (s)he watch your favorite movies?
does (s)he hold you when you cry?
does (s)he let you tell him(her) all your favorite parts?
when you've seen it a million times
does (s)he sing to all your music?
while you dance to purple rain
does (s)he do all these things?
like I used to?

will (s)he love you like I loved you?
will (s)he tell you everyday?
will (s)he make you feel like your invincible
with every word (s)he'll say
can you promise me that this was right?
don't throw it all away
can you do all these things?
will you do all these things?
like we used to?

-a rocket to the moon-

you could change who, but not what

HELLO!

setelah ujian akhir semester resmi dinyatakan selesai, kami pun sibuk menyusun proker hedon. dan proker pertama yg sudah terlaksana adalah malem mingguan di Semarang Fair alias pasar malem. berangkat ngumpul di rumah sy dulu, habis itu rame-rame nyerbu MAJT dan berasoy geboy disana. awalnya pengen masuk ke rumah setan, nah pas udah nyampe depan rumah setan ada yg merengek-rengek ga mau ikutan masuk, takut katanya. yasudah akhirnya ga jadi ke rumah setan, padahal sy pengen bgt, seumur-umur belom pernah menjajal rumah setan hehe tp berhubung para lelaki ga mau ikutan masuk, yaudah batal deh ke rumah setan, takut di grepe-grepe sm abang-abang setan nya hehehe. perjalanan pun dilanjutkan, dan akhirnya kita sepakat naik bianglala dengan syarat satu sangkar satu orang! oke, siapa takut! saya, yudith, renold patuh sm peraturan, tp ginting, nurul, puput, riana satu sangkar dua-duaan huh! bianglala lumayan jg bikin sport jantung + tremor, apalagi di menit-menit terakhir, sengaja dicepetin sm mas-mas nya. haduh ndeso banget ky ga pernah naik bianglala *emang ga pernah* haha

tujuan selanjutnya adalah ombak air. ini ga pake tenaga mesin lo bikin ombaknya, swear! yg muter-muterin mas-mas nya, jd murni pake tenaga manusia! dahsyat! sangar! handal! sampe ngowoh ngeliatin mas-mas nya breakdance di ombak air yg lg muter-muter, malah ada yg gelantungan segala, berasa nonton sirkus euy. nice perform, you're rawwwksss! \m/

proker-proker hedon lainnya masih dalam tahap perencanaan.

ayo dong jgn cm direncanain pengen ini itu, pengen kesini kesitu tp direalisasikan ya teman-teman! :p

well, let me say have a blast holiday, people!

"Without accepting the fact that everything changes, we cannot find perfect composure. But unfortunately, although it is true, it is difficult for us to accept it. Because we cannot accept the truth of transience, we suffer"

- Shunryu Suzuki

Out of the Orbit

HELLO

i'm not the one who had much experiences in love life, i mean in a relationshit status for several times so that i'm not well experienced about this one hehe but from novels i've read, films i've watched which exactly based on love stories i can conclude that a love story had a cycle. from nothing to everything then back into nothing.

stranger-friend-best friend-in love-broken hearted-hater-enemy-stranger

that's the cycle of the most love life *included me. lol*. everything starts from zero. you don't know who he is and so doesn't he. after both of you know each others, you two become friends and maybe getting closer and closer. friend grows up into close friend or best friend or besties or yah whatever you name it lah, it's one step higher than just a friend and one step closer to love ha-ha! nah, i think this is one of the hardest part when you finally realized that you had different feel for your best friend. you are in crossroad between loving is always owning: keep moving forward to fight your love and love isn't always owning so that you'd better to keep your friendship. some choose the first option: keep moving forward to fight love. best friends turn into in a relationship. i used to believe that everything has ups and downs side, so that love life. when your love journey comes to an end, this is what we called broken hearted. you've been hurted so damn, crying inside and outside. you are trying to show your mask face by smiling, but sometimes it doesn't work. don't worry, remember that your bestest friends are always beside you with their shoulder to cry on and told you that everything's gonna be alright :')

hater-enemy-stranger. well actually i don't like those three words. sounds not good to listen. maybe my cycle is currently stuck among those three. hater? enemy? or back into stranger? i don't know *sigh*. hater? oh c'mon how could i hate you???!! how hurt this pain allows me to hate you more and i've tried how to hate you. i keep trying and trying but i can't! i can't hate you, even just.. a bit. enemy? i give up for being a hater and also enemy. you are still with your zippered mouth and unreadable mind. you acted like you don't care and i did too. the fact is i care too much i think too much but i pretend like i give you no attention. we both still keep our silence, until.. yesterday. i wonder why my cycle doesn't rotate as it's orbit. some parts are lost. so, where is me? you? us? time doesn't have mouth, but it will answer everything.

Two Days to Go

taking my self out of the radar for the last two weeks. call me the bird on golden cage, but somehow i feel better when i find myself alone on my comfy room with those thick highschool-books on my hand and no one bothers me. if you thought it was about an obsession, then you're probably wrong, note that! welcoming wednesday with fulled spirit and shouted 'i'm ready! i'm ready to get my sweet escape!' GOD, please..

Inside Me Now There's Only Heartache and Pain

saya..
berada di titik mood terendah
dibombardir dari berbagai arah

mulai hari ini,
gak pengen log in facebook
HP jg sengaja sy titipin ke puput
saya pengen ngilang dulu dr peredaran
saya lg gak pengen diganggu
apapun
siapapun
saya pengen sendiri
bener-bener sendiri

dan buat kamu,
thanks for ruining my life. thankiou.
tak ada yg lebih menyakitkan drpd menyaksikan dengan MATA KEPALA SENDIRI.

pergilah bersamanya disana//dengan dia yg ada segalanya//bersenang-senanglah sepuasanya//biarkan disini ku menyendiri//terlintas keinginan tuk dapat//hilang ingatan agar semua terlupakan//dan ku berlari sekencang-kencangnya//tuk melupakan mu yg tlah berpaling..

a Confession

sepenggal lirik lagu Harder than You Know-nya Escape the Fate
buka mata, buka hati, perhatikan dengan seksama bagian yg berwarna merah.


***
maaf,
objek postingan blog atopun status-status di fb juga di plurkie masih sama

tentang dia
tentang dia
masih slalu tentang dia
i just can't let him go out of my mind.

Picts Speak Louder than Words

Hasil holga udah aku aplot,tp blm smpt ngtag kamu.hehe

girang bukan main wkt notifikasi facebook ngasi tau kalo kamu ngewall saya & ngasi kabar gembira ini
trs sy ijin buat ngedownload 16 foto yg ada di album 'My First Unlucky Roll'
deg-degan to the max wkt nungguin loading buka album ini
rada kecewa juga sih wkt liat hasilnya
tak apalah, namanya jg rol pertama
makin abstrak makin nyeni, ya gak?

foto yg atas sendiri itu foto kita di spion mobil derek di kota lama
foto yg kedua sy yg motoin
kalo foto terakhir itu salah satu halte keren di jogja

karena msh amatiran dan baru ini megang toycam
jd kita blm ngerti aturan main advance wheel
harusnya diputer sampe nomer selanjutnya, bukannya titik selanjutnya
makanya jd numpuk-numpuk gt
hehe

kota lama//gang sabung ayam//spion mobil derek//polder tawang//JEC//halte jogja//

satu rol film untuk seabrek kenangan yang.. argh.. kalo kt Marcell & Kahitna: tak-akan-terganti
saya kangen kamu
kangen holga dua-duanya
dan kangen rutinitas kita: berburu objek foto sampe lupa waktu.

where is the good in goodbye?

layang-layang saya putus

mungkin anginnya terlalu kencang

atau kesangkut layang-layang lain yg lebih besar *sigh*

padahal benangnya udah kuat
bukan benang sembarang benang..

saya..

takut main layang-layang lagi.. :(

Double the Trouble

(mungkin) Allah lagi sayang sayangnya sama sy, Allah lg sebegitu perhatiannya sama sy, makanya sy dikasi masalah keroyokan gini, yg belom mati satu tapi udah tumbuh seribu. (mungkin) ini bagian dr yg disebut-sebut proses pendewasaan dan mau tak mau (mungkin) sy dituntut harus menghadapinya ala orang dewasa, menghadapi, bukan lari. (mungkin) sy emang ceroboh, seperti yg kamu bilang. (mungkin) saya emang gak peka, dan merubah sy jadi peka itu gk gampang.
(mungkin) sy emang jadi makhluk super cengeng akhir-akhir ini. iya, saya jg ngerasa (mungkin) ini bukan sy yang dulu, yg anti nangis di depan orang. (mungkin) sy bukan sy yang dulu, yang pinter nyembunyiin masalah, berkamuflase dan memasang tampang i'm-okay-nothing-wrong-happened-with-me di depan sahabat. sudah sekuat tenaga hasrat untuk menangis itu sy bendung, berusaha menahan (mungkin) sampai sy dalam kondisi benar-benar sendiri dan melampiaskannya di pojokan kamar sampai tertidur tp sy gagal, sel-sel saraf mengomandokan aba-aba ke mata spy kelenjar air mata berproduksi lebih. menangis emang gk nyelesein masalah tapi (mungkin) ini wujud ekspresi ledakan tekanan batin yg terus menerus menekan, menggerus, dan meninggalkan lubang besar yg entah kapan bakal nutup lagi. sy emang salah, sekali lagi sy sadar sesadar-sadarnya kalau lagi-lagi sy salah dan kesalahan itu berakibat fatal. (mungkin)sy benar-benar butuh pskiater untuk menstabilkan sy yg lagi labil ini atau (mungkin) sy harus dirukiyah biar setan-setan yg nempel ilang dan sifat-sifat jelek sy yg bikin km sebel ilang. (mungkin) sy udh gk ngerti lg gimana cara ngebuka pintu maaf kamu yg udah digembok dan (mungkin) ditutup rapat-rapat tanpa celah itu. (mungkin) saya udah gk ngerti lg kemana mesti mengadu berkeluh-kesah meminta solusi ataupun (mungkin) hanya sekedar ingin didengarkan. pada akhirnya ketika seseorang sudah berada di suatu titik yg hanya beberapa senti menuju titik pusat keputusasaannya, berserah diri kepada Allah-lah solusi terbaik dari segala solusi-solusi terbaik. berusaha mendoktrin diri sendiri, kalau Allah sudah menyiapkan jalan keluar terbaik untuk semua masalah. semoga Allah nularin sifat pemaaf-Nya buat kamu ya.. amin
through at all, still.. nobody but you, R. i really miss the old you :(

Hari Ini Seminggu yang Lalu

berangkat 4 jam, singgah 3 jam, pulang 3 jam
bersenjatakan 2 holga dan sebuah camera digital
berbekal sebotol air mineral dan sebungkus amplang asli pangkalanbun yg masih terbungkus rapat sampai pulang (gak kemakan),
keliling-keliling kota dengan plat AB berseliweran (cuma buat nyari pombensin yg mushalanya sekeren mushala pombensin depan RRI,sayangnya gk nemu)
sesekali jeprat-jepret di jalan, juga di halte keren dengan background jadul gambar pahlawan
menyambangi JEC yang sore itu dipadati jubelan remaja, menghasilkan 2 plastik berisi sebuah polo shirt biru & sebuah kaos (kalo saja gk saya stop mungkin belanjaannya bisa beranak-pinak ky ibu-ibu pulang dr pasar)
menyempatkan mengisi makan siang sekaligus makan malam di soto ayam porsi jumbo dengan harga murah-meriah
setelah kenyang, gantian si mio yg dikasi makan full-tank dan langsung capcus menempuh kembali perjalanan puluhan (atau ratusan?) kilo, temenan sm transformer2 (bc: truk) segede bagong ditambah lagi jalanan dengan hutan di kanan-kiri yg superegelap hiii seram =.=
sok-sokan nekat jadi backpaker dan berakibat tepar seharian
pegel iya, ngantuk pasti
seneng? tentu saja :)

selaen jago makan, jago ngebanyol, jago menaikkan (sekaligus menurunkan) mood saya

ternyata  jago gambar juga 

:D

Kisah Tragis Rol Pertama

hari ini, di Wa**et, sebuah studio foto di kawasan tembalang..

mas bisa cuci-scan film 120?

oh bisa mas

*cengar-cengir senang bukan kepalang sambil ngeluarin rol film dr tas*
ini kemaren udah dicuci mas, tp gak bisa discan katanya

oalah pantes, apanya yg mau discan mas, rolnya aja polosan gini

hah?? *ngowoh mantengin rol yg berubah rupa jd mika transparan*

harusnya film kalo dicuci jdnya gk ky gini mas, gk transparan gini. liat nih indikatornya aja ilang semua. harusnya disini ada nomer-nomernya. film kalo udah dicuci warnanya cokelat, ky klise tu lo mas. kalo kebakarpun warnanya item, ga transparan ky gini

lo? kok bisa gitu mas???

ada beberapa kemungkinan, bs aja salah obat waktu proses cucinya. bisa jg wkt masang kameranya gak pas, jd gak nyantol

saya beli kamera second mas, udah dipasang rol filmnya sm yg punya. kemaren wkt filmnya abis advance wheelnya udh gak bs diputer, berarti emang filmnya udh muter kn?

mm... kalo salah masang film gak mungkin indikatornya sampe ilang semua. kemungkinan ini salah obat mas. biasanya transparan gini gara2 film BW tapi dicuci pake obat yg buat film warna, jdnya ya ky gini

trus?? gak bisa dibalikin lagi mas?? *muka lemes*

ya gak bisa.. harusnya masnya ngecek dulu di selongsongan rolnya, BW/colour. jadi gak salah waktu nyuci.

kita jg gak tau mas, baru sekali ini maen2 rol film

kemaren dicuci dimana?

di k*dak bangkong, tp cm dikasi tau kalo gak bs discan, gak dikasi tau alesannya. duit bwt scan jg dibalikin

coba aja masnya kesana lg, tanyain kok bisa ky gini, gara2 salah obat/salah masang rolnya. tp mesti mereka jwbnya gr2 salah masang rol, gak mungkin mereka jujur. kemaren wkt abis nyuci gak dicek dulu rolnya?

gak mas.. kita kn juga gak ngerti apa-apa.. yauda deh makasih ya mas..




di k*dak bangkong..

eh mas, ada apa?

ini lo mas, rol yg kemaren kok gak bisa discan knp ya??

oh jd gini, ini kayaknya rol BW mas, langka banget rol yg ky gini. sebenernya kita gak melayani scan rol ky gini, kita ngelayanin yg umum2 aja, yg Color. jadi kita ngiranya ya rolnya mas yg Colour. ya gini jadinya, jd transparan gini, gak bisa discan. kalo rol yg baru dipasang di kameranya masnya yg kemaren itu udah jelas rol warna..

*batin: meneketehe kalo itu BW. lagian jg situ asal cuci seenak udhel!*
gak bisa dibalikin lg ya mas??

ya gak bisa..

hm.. yaudah deh makasih mas..

iya, sorry ya!
**

sampai sekarangpun masih berat banget buat ngikhlasin
belom bisa nrima kalo rol itu diperlakukan semena-mena oleh oknum yg tidak bertanggungjawab
pengen maki-maki
pengen nyumpah-nyumpahin
tp toh gak bakal bs balikin rol itu lg
kalo saja itu bukan rol pertama dan kalo saja isinya bukan momen seistimewa itu
mungkin saya ga bakal segelo ini
berhari-hari dilanda penasaran gimana fantastiknya hasil jepretan holga, si makhluk penuh kejutan yg selama ini cuma saya liat hasilnya di internet dan selalu membuat saya berdecak kagum
yasudahlah, apa mau dikata
harusnya kalo rol pertama ini berhasil discan, saya bisa belajar banyak dr hasilnya, byar lebih pro lagi make holga
tapi gak disangka malah kacau balau ky gini

if i could press the undo button
then back to that day & capture all moments, once again.. :(

Special Gift from Someone Special

hello
so yesterday was our day and definitely hedon day! fyi, celebrate it has been our routinity :)
we watched muvee together, then had steak for dinner at WS sampangan, after that we went to kota lama, enjoyed the night view there with it's vintage atmosphere, having chit-chat, joking, laughing and.. wishing *only us & God who knows our wishes* :)

then suddenly he told me that he was thirsty. he asked me to buy a glass of iced tea, not so far from there. then when i back, i saw he was hiding something behind his bag. i walked and walked closer to him, then taraaaaaaa! i was shocked to the max seeing him hold something, a thing that made me breathless, speachless, wordless. we chased each other. i run to him, he was smiling and laughing and keep holding that 'something'. you know what, that 'something' is holga CMY 120! :)

what a big surprise! i've told to you, bloggy that i want lomo camera so muchies esp holga multicolour. i've told it hundreds time maybe. aaaaah it's the best surprise ever! :) he took candid photo of me when i run into him with my shocked face hahaha. he drape the holga around my neck, he convinced me that i wasn't dreaming, he convinced me that our biggest dream: havin holga, not only a dream anymore but it becomes reality! i just cant stop smiling, i cant stop saying thanks and thanks and thanks to him. after i woke up from unconscious condition *lebay*, we go around kota lama and took some picts around gereja blenduk, of course with holga! can't wait to see the result! :)

this is what i've been dreamed since i was on senior high school, but make it true seems so impossible for me. when i told him about lomography, he also excited & interested & falling for holga multicolour at the first sight. we decided to buy it together and each of us must save 10 thousand rupiahs a week. whenever and wherever we are, we always talk about holga holga holga and holga. our friends called us freak hahaha every night we stayed awake just for browsing any informations about holga and disscussed it together on facebook chat. we shared links that we've found, threads on kaskus that sell holga, blogs that containing the result of holga, some online stores on facebook that sell holga, or even people's deviantart hahaha but before we started to save our money to buy our holga hemh... he made that big surprise for me :)

did you notice that i put too many ":)" smiley here there and everywhere? did you notice that? hehe it reflects my feeling a looooooootssss :)))

hoaaaa i think i should end this before i blabber much much more.
thanks for keep staying here. ciao!

ps:
happy two months anniv :)

(un)readable

you put colour to my black-and-white-life

xoxoxo

 shooted by R

editted by me

ps:

post was editted hihi